Saturday, August 11, 2007

Bourne Goals: Submission Request

Just saw the Bourne Ultimatum. And on the train ride home was inspired to write 4 more ideas that they could do to continue the saga. Feel free to submit your own ideas under comments or as a seperate goals post.

1) The Bourne Shenanigans: This is more of a documentary, but still keeps to the 6 syllable title. Basically Jason Bourne breaks into hollywood "A-lister" homes and pulls pranks. Think about it, he's Jason Bourne. He can get in and out of any building without being scene. He could rearrange Tom Cruise's living room into a Catholic Cathedral, or set up a spy-cam into Jessica Alba's bed room.

2) Bourne Play: Jason Bourne vs. Chucky. This movie will involve a lot of running by Jason Bourne only to turn around and see that Chucky is still on his tail, laughing, swearing and wielding a big knife. The movie culminates into a big fight scene on a bridge in which Bourne is holding Chucky while the doll is flailing his arms. Bourne defeats Chucky by throwing him over the bridge onto a floating barge, which catches fire, and incidentally sets the whole East River up in flames. The movie ends with the Bourne theme music coming up and Chucky screaming obscenities.

3) Bourne 24: In season 4, Jack Bauer has 24 hours to catch a terrorist plotting to kill the head of the CIA, and the killer is none other than Jason Bourne. With a 1/2 hour left Bourne and Bauer realize they are on the same side and trying to kill the same evil agent and combine forces and off the terrorist with 28 minutes to spare. Needless to say Bourne got into Bauer's way.

4) Bourne Barleycorn: Taking place in Chicago and directed by Robert Rodriquez, Jason Bourne's travels take him to Chicago to meet Ronny Woo-Woo who claims to know a vital piece of Bourne's past. They meet at the John Barleycorn where Bourne finds out that the John Barleycorn is a secret werewolf bar. He looks out the window to see a full-moon and then Ronny Woo-Woo locks the door.

Thank you and good night...


AngryWhiteMan said...

Bourne Gay - Speaks for itself.

J.ust O.ver B.roke said...

If you were an actor you could star in that one, AWM!