1. greetings from amsterdam! yes i could not be higher right now
2. i just sent nicho an email that said "die"
4. JOB
4. i love shari n.
Showing posts with label I Fucked a Donkey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I Fucked a Donkey. Show all posts
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
The Sooner I Leave, the Better: What I've Learned in 2 weeks in Oklahoma
Get it? Sooner? Ha
As you may or not be aware, I've been in Kansas/Oklahoma for the past two weeks (working in KS, but my hotel is in OK). Its been an interesting two weeks. Lets take a look see at what I've learned thus far...
-Every chick is named Tammy
-Every dude is named Scott, Matt or Chad
-apparently there is this band called "Seether" that is just beyond huge down here. They play this song on the radio constantly where, in the chorus, the lead singer refers to someone as "such a f*cking hipocrite" but they edit out the "f word", but not enough to where we don't know what he's saying. I thought this was the bible belt!!??
-the indian casinos are abundant. There was even a mini one attached to a truck stop where I got gas yesterday, just north of Ponca City OK. Played two hands of Pai Gow after I filled the tank
-before getting here, I assumed all Oklahomans looked, talked and acted exactly like famous resident Brian Bosworth. Turns out I was absolutely right
-there are places called "Ponca City". No joke!
-at the aforementioned indian Casinos, it is required to play a 50 cent ante along with every blackjack hand, regardless of the size of your bet. This was a very clever maneuver...as I found it more worthwhile to play $10 hands, as opposed to the $2 minimum. Still, F them for making me do that.
-I'll pause for a moment so some of you can google "Brian Bosworth"
-70MPH Speed limits on backwoods country roads are commonplace. As is driving 40MPH on said roads.
-good looking people are banned from both states. Anyone who wants to present evidence to the contrary, please feel free. I thought my server at a restaurant yesterday was going to apologize for being so homely. I know this sounds mean...but you just had to have been there. I tipped her well, don't worry
-due to the aforementioned observation, I find that I'm talking myself into some of the most mediocre-looking people you could possibly imagine. I sh*t you not, two nights ago I got carryout from a BBQ joint down the street from my hotel, and the hostess, probably not a day older than 20, gave me a flirtatious smile after handing me my babyback rib combo (w/ fried okra and cole slaw...lemonaid to drink). After walking to my car, I thought about running back in and asking her out. After that came a tailspin of strange thoughts- how creeped out would she be if I asked her if she wanted to come back to my hotel and watch Disney Channel? (more on disney channel in a moment) What if we started dating? What if we engaged in sexual acts...but for the soul purpose of me having a funny story for Steve when I got home? What would her friends think of me? Would they think of me as being sophistacted and refined, because I live in Chicago? Or are people from big cities considered creepy and borderline gay? Would it be impressive to her if I knew all the words to a Seether song? Would she be impressed if I told her I knew a girl from Belgium? I kid you not, these thoughts all went through my head.
-there are billboards everywhere for this show on Disney Channel called "Hannah Montana" or something. And by accident last week (and by this point, I would freely admit it if it were on purpose), I caught about 10 minutes of this show. My first thought was, who is this dad character trying to be? A scaled down 21st century version of Billy Ray Cyrus? Then...to my shock, the ending credits rolled, and I realized it was actually Billy Ray Cyrus. Then the chick that played Hannah Montana that suspiciously no one referred to even once as "Hannah" was played by someone called "Miley Cyrus" who after some digging, turned out to be Billy Ray's daughter. Ok, all kidding aside, when was it ultimately decided that Billy Ray Cyrus does not frighten small children, and thus, is deserving of a starring role on apparently the highest rated sitcom on cable TV?
-I'll pause so you can finish reading the history of The Rib Crib in Tulsa OK
-I'm 99% sure that when the pregnant teens here are about to give birth, they all go through the same thought process: "well I want my baby to stand out...and be different! But not too different...I don't want to give her a name that'll get her made fun of at school. What if...what if I just switch out the 'y' with an 'i'? I'm pretty sure I'm the first pregnant teen to think of that!!" Thus...the preponderance of names like Wendi, Tami, Cari, and Mindi. Its like the poetic license of every white trash pregnant teenager. I can't get enough of it
-the following technologies and/or innovations are either undiscovered, or rendered completely unnecessary in the Bartlesville, Oklahoma area:
-water pressure
-picture messaging
-DVR (when I mentioned my DVR to my bartender, Scott, he looked at me like I had 3 heads)
-cruise control (neither of my rental cars had functioning CC)
-staying on 12 when the dealer is showing 6. Unconscionable!!
-wearing a tie (swear on my life, haven't seen one person in a tie yet. I still have 24 hours left here...I'll let you know if anything changes in that department)
-And finally, one of the more disturbing trends is the existence of a christian church across the street or next door to every sinning depot (bar, casino, strip club, Walmart, etc.) I found this highly amusing...as it could very easily be a feature in something like SimCity. Not unlike how, in that game, you could strategically place a police station to keep the crime low in industrialized, low income areas (read: ghetto), apparently the city planners, in conjunction with the baptist churches, have determined that seeing a church next door might deter Scott/Chad/Matt from stuffing a roll of quarters down Tammy's g-string.
I feel like all of these things should be printed on a tourist brochure for Oklahoma. Its faaaantastic!
happy hump day kids
As you may or not be aware, I've been in Kansas/Oklahoma for the past two weeks (working in KS, but my hotel is in OK). Its been an interesting two weeks. Lets take a look see at what I've learned thus far...
-Every chick is named Tammy
-Every dude is named Scott, Matt or Chad
-apparently there is this band called "Seether" that is just beyond huge down here. They play this song on the radio constantly where, in the chorus, the lead singer refers to someone as "such a f*cking hipocrite" but they edit out the "f word", but not enough to where we don't know what he's saying. I thought this was the bible belt!!??
-the indian casinos are abundant. There was even a mini one attached to a truck stop where I got gas yesterday, just north of Ponca City OK. Played two hands of Pai Gow after I filled the tank
-before getting here, I assumed all Oklahomans looked, talked and acted exactly like famous resident Brian Bosworth. Turns out I was absolutely right
-there are places called "Ponca City". No joke!
-at the aforementioned indian Casinos, it is required to play a 50 cent ante along with every blackjack hand, regardless of the size of your bet. This was a very clever maneuver...as I found it more worthwhile to play $10 hands, as opposed to the $2 minimum. Still, F them for making me do that.
-I'll pause for a moment so some of you can google "Brian Bosworth"
-70MPH Speed limits on backwoods country roads are commonplace. As is driving 40MPH on said roads.
-good looking people are banned from both states. Anyone who wants to present evidence to the contrary, please feel free. I thought my server at a restaurant yesterday was going to apologize for being so homely. I know this sounds mean...but you just had to have been there. I tipped her well, don't worry
-due to the aforementioned observation, I find that I'm talking myself into some of the most mediocre-looking people you could possibly imagine. I sh*t you not, two nights ago I got carryout from a BBQ joint down the street from my hotel, and the hostess, probably not a day older than 20, gave me a flirtatious smile after handing me my babyback rib combo (w/ fried okra and cole slaw...lemonaid to drink). After walking to my car, I thought about running back in and asking her out. After that came a tailspin of strange thoughts- how creeped out would she be if I asked her if she wanted to come back to my hotel and watch Disney Channel? (more on disney channel in a moment) What if we started dating? What if we engaged in sexual acts...but for the soul purpose of me having a funny story for Steve when I got home? What would her friends think of me? Would they think of me as being sophistacted and refined, because I live in Chicago? Or are people from big cities considered creepy and borderline gay? Would it be impressive to her if I knew all the words to a Seether song? Would she be impressed if I told her I knew a girl from Belgium? I kid you not, these thoughts all went through my head.
-there are billboards everywhere for this show on Disney Channel called "Hannah Montana" or something. And by accident last week (and by this point, I would freely admit it if it were on purpose), I caught about 10 minutes of this show. My first thought was, who is this dad character trying to be? A scaled down 21st century version of Billy Ray Cyrus? Then...to my shock, the ending credits rolled, and I realized it was actually Billy Ray Cyrus. Then the chick that played Hannah Montana that suspiciously no one referred to even once as "Hannah" was played by someone called "Miley Cyrus" who after some digging, turned out to be Billy Ray's daughter. Ok, all kidding aside, when was it ultimately decided that Billy Ray Cyrus does not frighten small children, and thus, is deserving of a starring role on apparently the highest rated sitcom on cable TV?
-I'll pause so you can finish reading the history of The Rib Crib in Tulsa OK
-I'm 99% sure that when the pregnant teens here are about to give birth, they all go through the same thought process: "well I want my baby to stand out...and be different! But not too different...I don't want to give her a name that'll get her made fun of at school. What if...what if I just switch out the 'y' with an 'i'? I'm pretty sure I'm the first pregnant teen to think of that!!" Thus...the preponderance of names like Wendi, Tami, Cari, and Mindi. Its like the poetic license of every white trash pregnant teenager. I can't get enough of it
-the following technologies and/or innovations are either undiscovered, or rendered completely unnecessary in the Bartlesville, Oklahoma area:
-water pressure
-picture messaging
-DVR (when I mentioned my DVR to my bartender, Scott, he looked at me like I had 3 heads)
-cruise control (neither of my rental cars had functioning CC)
-staying on 12 when the dealer is showing 6. Unconscionable!!
-wearing a tie (swear on my life, haven't seen one person in a tie yet. I still have 24 hours left here...I'll let you know if anything changes in that department)
-And finally, one of the more disturbing trends is the existence of a christian church across the street or next door to every sinning depot (bar, casino, strip club, Walmart, etc.) I found this highly amusing...as it could very easily be a feature in something like SimCity. Not unlike how, in that game, you could strategically place a police station to keep the crime low in industrialized, low income areas (read: ghetto), apparently the city planners, in conjunction with the baptist churches, have determined that seeing a church next door might deter Scott/Chad/Matt from stuffing a roll of quarters down Tammy's g-string.
I feel like all of these things should be printed on a tourist brochure for Oklahoma. Its faaaantastic!
happy hump day kids
Thursday, October 18, 2007
...and that saga is finally over
Career Education: Report Calls For No Further Action >CECO Oct 18, 2007 15:43:39 (ET)
Career Education Corp. (CECO) said Thursday that a special committee of a regional accrediting body won't recommend further corrective action for the company's American InterContinental University, whose accreditation is on probationary status.
Career Education said the committee's recent report isn't a final determination on the probationary status, and that the Commission on Colleges isn't required to accept the committee's conclusions.
American InterContinental University has been on probation since December 2005, and that status will continue through the end of this year.
The Hoffman Estates, Ill., for-profit provider of post-secondary education expects the Commission on Colleges to announce any actions in December, according to a Securities and Exchange Commission filing.
And in a related story, Brown Buddy just made a dick load of money! Ok, so maybe not a dickload, but the stock skyrocketed to $35.00 a share, and since its unlikely it'll get any higher than $40 (and more likely to drop to the $30 range), I sold it off. All of it. Made about 4 grand or so...not bad for a days work :)
Career Education Corp. (CECO) said Thursday that a special committee of a regional accrediting body won't recommend further corrective action for the company's American InterContinental University, whose accreditation is on probationary status.
Career Education said the committee's recent report isn't a final determination on the probationary status, and that the Commission on Colleges isn't required to accept the committee's conclusions.
American InterContinental University has been on probation since December 2005, and that status will continue through the end of this year.
The Hoffman Estates, Ill., for-profit provider of post-secondary education expects the Commission on Colleges to announce any actions in December, according to a Securities and Exchange Commission filing.
And in a related story, Brown Buddy just made a dick load of money! Ok, so maybe not a dickload, but the stock skyrocketed to $35.00 a share, and since its unlikely it'll get any higher than $40 (and more likely to drop to the $30 range), I sold it off. All of it. Made about 4 grand or so...not bad for a days work :)
Monday, September 10, 2007
Goals, Debacles and South America
1. First, allow me to apologize for not posting in forever…Scranton has been really, really busy and my weekends have been crazy…New York, Philly, Poconos, etc…anyway, I’m back bitches.
2. Ok…so I’m leaving again…but this time it’s out of the country. Thursday evening I board a flight from JFK in New York to Lima, Peru. I’ll be there for 11 days hiking, hitchhiking, creating international disturbances, etc. To see the Machu Picchu Trek I’m doing you can look here: http://www.llamapath.com/lares.htm. I’ll be in Lima, Cusco and somewhere in the Andes Mountains.
3. After Peru…I’m back (again)…looks like Munster, Indiana is the next stop for this guy. I will be in attendance at BB’s Beertober Fest (and I think my German name should get me in for free). I know I know, Irish guy with a German name, that’s how adoption works, kids.
4. Please allow me to address the Michigan situation briefly. First, Michigan was highly overrated going into the season…meaning, they lost most of their defense and all of the secondary (hence them giving up something like 500 yards in the first half to Oregon). Second, this is going to benefit the team in the long run. I feel terrible for Jake Long and Mike Hart, who came back this year to beat Ohio State and win a Bowl Game (both of which could still happen, I suppose). It’s clear that Long and Hart are not to blame for either, especially when you look at the numbers: 48 attempts, 315 yards, 6.6 YPC, 3 TD’s, 0 fumbles. Henne’s out this weekend against Notre Dame, which at this point, might be a blessing. The more interesting story is that Michigan is not disclosing the injury, which makes me think he either had a severe meltdown, is embarrassed or just a pussy who can’t take the pressure. John Fucking Navarre won more big games than this guy. Ryan Mallett, the highly touted freshman will start in his place on Saturday. Mallett and Clausen are each the quarterbacks of the future and hopefully Mallett won’t have to do much. Finally, even after the lost to App State, I felt like Carr’s job was safe until after the season…now I’m not so sure. Firing a coach (especially someone like Carr who’s been around for years) is NOT the “Michigan Way” but you know what? Fuck the Michigan Way. Carr’s time has passed, it’s easy to see: the boring playbook, inability to make in game adjustments, atrocious special teams play, can’t beat Tressel, failure to motivate and prepare his players (including an offense LOADED with Seniors) and a defense that looks lost…The season is ruined, the program embarrassed and the fans shell-shocked. We still haven’t won a game since Bo died and it makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I’m cutting it off right now before my day is ruined.
2. Ok…so I’m leaving again…but this time it’s out of the country. Thursday evening I board a flight from JFK in New York to Lima, Peru. I’ll be there for 11 days hiking, hitchhiking, creating international disturbances, etc. To see the Machu Picchu Trek I’m doing you can look here: http://www.llamapath.com/lares.htm. I’ll be in Lima, Cusco and somewhere in the Andes Mountains.
3. After Peru…I’m back (again)…looks like Munster, Indiana is the next stop for this guy. I will be in attendance at BB’s Beertober Fest (and I think my German name should get me in for free). I know I know, Irish guy with a German name, that’s how adoption works, kids.
4. Please allow me to address the Michigan situation briefly. First, Michigan was highly overrated going into the season…meaning, they lost most of their defense and all of the secondary (hence them giving up something like 500 yards in the first half to Oregon). Second, this is going to benefit the team in the long run. I feel terrible for Jake Long and Mike Hart, who came back this year to beat Ohio State and win a Bowl Game (both of which could still happen, I suppose). It’s clear that Long and Hart are not to blame for either, especially when you look at the numbers: 48 attempts, 315 yards, 6.6 YPC, 3 TD’s, 0 fumbles. Henne’s out this weekend against Notre Dame, which at this point, might be a blessing. The more interesting story is that Michigan is not disclosing the injury, which makes me think he either had a severe meltdown, is embarrassed or just a pussy who can’t take the pressure. John Fucking Navarre won more big games than this guy. Ryan Mallett, the highly touted freshman will start in his place on Saturday. Mallett and Clausen are each the quarterbacks of the future and hopefully Mallett won’t have to do much. Finally, even after the lost to App State, I felt like Carr’s job was safe until after the season…now I’m not so sure. Firing a coach (especially someone like Carr who’s been around for years) is NOT the “Michigan Way” but you know what? Fuck the Michigan Way. Carr’s time has passed, it’s easy to see: the boring playbook, inability to make in game adjustments, atrocious special teams play, can’t beat Tressel, failure to motivate and prepare his players (including an offense LOADED with Seniors) and a defense that looks lost…The season is ruined, the program embarrassed and the fans shell-shocked. We still haven’t won a game since Bo died and it makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it. I’m cutting it off right now before my day is ruined.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Where we at??
Alright, no one going to post? Dammit I will...
1) I know everyone has a boner for the NFL right now, but I'm one of the few who possesses the ability to see through the ridiculous spectacle. The pre-game Faith Hill musical followed by This Is Our Country/Peyton Manning commercials, can I say it took roughly 3 minutes to be sick of the NFL being in love with itself. I watched South Park during the commercials and watched the game on mute. Luckily for me, I missed Andrea Kramer equating Tony Dungy's Super Bowl win to various moments of the civil rights movement. I'll take the pennant races, thanks!
2) I'm a huge advocate of anyone who can point out that Scoop Jackson is the biggest fucking hack toolbox on the planet. God he sucks. (thats a hilarious read, by the way)
3) NO one has anything to say about Michigan last weekend? I know Skurny is keeping quiet for obvious reasons...but this is right in JOB's wheelhouse! My stance on the situation was, yeah...it was a great game, fun to watch, great for college football (in that the powder puff early seasons scheduling HAS to end, doens't it??). But really...and I mean really...are we really that happy about something that has Ohio State fans elated right now?
4) Got into an argument this weekend with several people that don't know what they are talking about. Do you know Paula Deen on the Food Network? The old white haired lady that is a walking southern stereotype? Well, let me clue you in on something- NO ONE IN THE SOUTH TALKS LIKE THAT! THAT'S A FUCKING CARTOON CHARACTER! I cannot stress that enough. In the 8 years I lived in Virginia (and this is southwest VA, not DC northern VA, so spare me the "that aint the south" bullshit), I've never in my fucking life heard anyone talk like her (or her cartoonish sons, the hosts of Road Tested). In fact, I'd go as far to say that their bojangling, cartoonish shtick makes every REAL southerner look bad. Its a joke, and someone had to say something. So there. I said it!
Talk amongst yourselves
1) I know everyone has a boner for the NFL right now, but I'm one of the few who possesses the ability to see through the ridiculous spectacle. The pre-game Faith Hill musical followed by This Is Our Country/Peyton Manning commercials, can I say it took roughly 3 minutes to be sick of the NFL being in love with itself. I watched South Park during the commercials and watched the game on mute. Luckily for me, I missed Andrea Kramer equating Tony Dungy's Super Bowl win to various moments of the civil rights movement. I'll take the pennant races, thanks!
2) I'm a huge advocate of anyone who can point out that Scoop Jackson is the biggest fucking hack toolbox on the planet. God he sucks. (thats a hilarious read, by the way)
3) NO one has anything to say about Michigan last weekend? I know Skurny is keeping quiet for obvious reasons...but this is right in JOB's wheelhouse! My stance on the situation was, yeah...it was a great game, fun to watch, great for college football (in that the powder puff early seasons scheduling HAS to end, doens't it??). But really...and I mean really...are we really that happy about something that has Ohio State fans elated right now?
4) Got into an argument this weekend with several people that don't know what they are talking about. Do you know Paula Deen on the Food Network? The old white haired lady that is a walking southern stereotype? Well, let me clue you in on something- NO ONE IN THE SOUTH TALKS LIKE THAT! THAT'S A FUCKING CARTOON CHARACTER! I cannot stress that enough. In the 8 years I lived in Virginia (and this is southwest VA, not DC northern VA, so spare me the "that aint the south" bullshit), I've never in my fucking life heard anyone talk like her (or her cartoonish sons, the hosts of Road Tested). In fact, I'd go as far to say that their bojangling, cartoonish shtick makes every REAL southerner look bad. Its a joke, and someone had to say something. So there. I said it!
Talk amongst yourselves
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Yo Yo Yo!! Bitches!!!1
Got some big news coming up soon but I can't tell you what. No, I didn't get any chick pregnant. That can't happen when you bone dudes.
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
1) Salty hits a 2 run single against the Indians. The Braves? Lets just say NEVER underestimate what one patient bat can do to a lineup. They sent 11 men to the plate in the first inning, and ended up scoring 12 total. And ohbytheway, Big Tex hit a 3 run dong, totaled 4 RBI's. I'm going to love this lineup...probably...no, not probably, EASILY the best lineup, top to bottom, that they've EVER had (and this includes the 2003 team, which scored over 900 runs, which hasn't been matched by an NL team since). Sorry kids, this aint your older brother's Braves...
2) This story will probably be bypassed by mainstream media, but it shouldn't. It might be a long time before you read about a bunch of rich old white dudes doing what is right, rather than doing what is profitable. They kept that team in Nashville (where the market completely sucks), out of loyalty, rather than sell to the rich Canadian, who had every intention on moving the team to Winnipeg (or Hamilton). I admit, I was actually rooting for them to move...but I have to admire that kind of loyalty. I strongly recommend you all read that article.
3) Have I discussed the Simpsons Movie yet?? I saw it Sunday afternoon- best movie I've seen this year. What did I like most? There were moments in that movie that I almost felt like crying...I identify with those characters that much. What did I like least? Mr. Burns is almost non-existent! How does that happen!?!
4) The numbers came out today. Of all the new people that started at my company since March, I'm #1 in billing...and its not even close. I don't even work that hard...I can't really explain it...well, maybe I can. AIU, for all its faults, teaches a salesperson how to deal with several types of personalities. A successful recruiter needs that kind of experience.
I never thought I'd ever give that place any credit...I'm going to go take a cold shower now
2) This story will probably be bypassed by mainstream media, but it shouldn't. It might be a long time before you read about a bunch of rich old white dudes doing what is right, rather than doing what is profitable. They kept that team in Nashville (where the market completely sucks), out of loyalty, rather than sell to the rich Canadian, who had every intention on moving the team to Winnipeg (or Hamilton). I admit, I was actually rooting for them to move...but I have to admire that kind of loyalty. I strongly recommend you all read that article.
3) Have I discussed the Simpsons Movie yet?? I saw it Sunday afternoon- best movie I've seen this year. What did I like most? There were moments in that movie that I almost felt like crying...I identify with those characters that much. What did I like least? Mr. Burns is almost non-existent! How does that happen!?!
4) The numbers came out today. Of all the new people that started at my company since March, I'm #1 in billing...and its not even close. I don't even work that hard...I can't really explain it...well, maybe I can. AIU, for all its faults, teaches a salesperson how to deal with several types of personalities. A successful recruiter needs that kind of experience.
I never thought I'd ever give that place any credit...I'm going to go take a cold shower now
Monday, July 16, 2007
I'm Back, Bitches
1) Just got back from a long weekend in Put-in-Bay, Ohio (one of the Lake Erie Islands off the coast of Sandusky/Port Clinton). One of the most debaucherous weekends of my life...I wish I could share some stories here, but it'll have to wait until one of you gets me drunk. Trust me, it may be worth it to get me drunk some time in the near future (like its really hard, or something)
2) Head over to ESPN for a fascinating BS Report, Bill Simmons' podcast, where he and his guest, Jimmy Kimmel intimated that everyone hates Matt Leinert. By everyone, we mean Peyton Manning and Ben Roethlisberger.
3) On that note, if any of you watched the ESPY's, you are a massive tool.
4) Wednesday night- Andrew Miller against Johan Santana. Something tells me Skurny will agree with me that this could be a matchup of two lefties that can and probably will dominate the league for the next 8 years at least. (Though Miller needs some work on that second pitch...he's a one trick pony so far)
2) Head over to ESPN for a fascinating BS Report, Bill Simmons' podcast, where he and his guest, Jimmy Kimmel intimated that everyone hates Matt Leinert. By everyone, we mean Peyton Manning and Ben Roethlisberger.
3) On that note, if any of you watched the ESPY's, you are a massive tool.
4) Wednesday night- Andrew Miller against Johan Santana. Something tells me Skurny will agree with me that this could be a matchup of two lefties that can and probably will dominate the league for the next 8 years at least. (Though Miller needs some work on that second pitch...he's a one trick pony so far)
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Some Random Thoughts on a Surprisingly Eventful Evening in Sports
I was just about to write a heartfelt and sincere letter of regret to Celtics fans everywhere for falling to #5 in the draft lottery. Then I came to a realization. Well, a series of realizations, actually. Why on earth would I ever feel sorry for Boston sports fans? Sure, their flagbearer, Bill Simmons, is probably on suicide watch right now, but have these people had THAT much to complain about in recent years? The Red Sox are 10 games up on the Yankees right now. The Patriots are...well...the Patriots. And the other two teams, while certainly not very good, are far from the worst in their respective leagues. The Bruins are shitty, but, like the Celtics, this is due to their completely incompetent front office (Joe Thornton for Brad Stuart, anyone?)
Now, my question is this: Why should ineptitude be rewarded by getting a top pick in the draft? Thats what I never understand about the NBA and NFL drafts- they essentially reward utter incompetence. Now, all griping aside, the Celtics are probably missing out on one of two franchise guys (Julian Wright is a franchise guy, in my opinion, but he'll probably be gone at 4)
That being said...
The Celtics will now add a top 5 pick in a loaded draft to a fairly promising young core of Gerald Green and Al Jefferson (and if they suck again this year, which is always likely, they can trade Paul Pierce for a pick next year. Eric Gordon, anyone? He's my early pick for #1 in '08 after he'll lead Indiana to a Big Ten title and final four appearance)
Some other thoughts...
-Skurny even you'll have to agree that Ducks centerman Ryan Getzlaf is a star in the making. I remember seeing him in the young stars game at the All Star game this year and coming away impressed. He has a great presence about him, and always seems to be in the right place. For those of you saying, "who?" allow me to compare. Getzlaf is like....a young Tayshaun Prince. Only white, Canadian, well-nourished and able to skate backwards.
-Kyle Davies shut down the Mets tonight. 8 innings, 4 hits, 1 run. Oh, and he hit a 3-run bomb in the 5th to boot. Nice night...is it too early to say the Braves flat out own the Mets this year? 7-2 against them so far....
-Brian Engblom may have the greatest hair in the history of NHL in-studio commentators. And with a population that currently includes Barry Melrose, Ray Ferraro and Brett Hull, that is truly saying something.
-Has anyone even discussed the idea of a Jazz/Cavs finals?? Backstabber against LeBron. Two franchises that have never won a title. Would you not be intrigued by this? The NBA is fixed, right? Why can't they make this happen?
-Both the Ducks and the Wings have tremendous uniforms, in my humble opinion. Which leads me to my question of the evening: what sports team has the best uniforms? Everyone provide their top 5. I'm going with:
5. Yankees -I fuckin' hate 'em, but the pinstripes are classic.
4. Montreal Canadiens -the Canadian Yankees- Le Bleu Blanc Rouge is a timeless look..never changes
3. Minnesota Twins -totally underrated. Love the pinstriped pants.
2. Detroit Tigers (home only) -the caligrophe (sp?) D, simple, classic look.
1. Chicago Blackhawks -by far my favorite in all of sports, always has been, probably always will be. Not only is Chief Blackhawk not at all politically incorrect, but the horizontal stripes on the bottom of the sweater add a brilliant touch. I'm sure Wirtz will change it up next year. God I hate him...
Now, my question is this: Why should ineptitude be rewarded by getting a top pick in the draft? Thats what I never understand about the NBA and NFL drafts- they essentially reward utter incompetence. Now, all griping aside, the Celtics are probably missing out on one of two franchise guys (Julian Wright is a franchise guy, in my opinion, but he'll probably be gone at 4)
That being said...
The Celtics will now add a top 5 pick in a loaded draft to a fairly promising young core of Gerald Green and Al Jefferson (and if they suck again this year, which is always likely, they can trade Paul Pierce for a pick next year. Eric Gordon, anyone? He's my early pick for #1 in '08 after he'll lead Indiana to a Big Ten title and final four appearance)
Some other thoughts...
-Skurny even you'll have to agree that Ducks centerman Ryan Getzlaf is a star in the making. I remember seeing him in the young stars game at the All Star game this year and coming away impressed. He has a great presence about him, and always seems to be in the right place. For those of you saying, "who?" allow me to compare. Getzlaf is like....a young Tayshaun Prince. Only white, Canadian, well-nourished and able to skate backwards.
-Kyle Davies shut down the Mets tonight. 8 innings, 4 hits, 1 run. Oh, and he hit a 3-run bomb in the 5th to boot. Nice night...is it too early to say the Braves flat out own the Mets this year? 7-2 against them so far....
-Brian Engblom may have the greatest hair in the history of NHL in-studio commentators. And with a population that currently includes Barry Melrose, Ray Ferraro and Brett Hull, that is truly saying something.
-Has anyone even discussed the idea of a Jazz/Cavs finals?? Backstabber against LeBron. Two franchises that have never won a title. Would you not be intrigued by this? The NBA is fixed, right? Why can't they make this happen?
-Both the Ducks and the Wings have tremendous uniforms, in my humble opinion. Which leads me to my question of the evening: what sports team has the best uniforms? Everyone provide their top 5. I'm going with:
5. Yankees -I fuckin' hate 'em, but the pinstripes are classic.
4. Montreal Canadiens -the Canadian Yankees- Le Bleu Blanc Rouge is a timeless look..never changes
3. Minnesota Twins -totally underrated. Love the pinstriped pants.
2. Detroit Tigers (home only) -the caligrophe (sp?) D, simple, classic look.
1. Chicago Blackhawks -by far my favorite in all of sports, always has been, probably always will be. Not only is Chief Blackhawk not at all politically incorrect, but the horizontal stripes on the bottom of the sweater add a brilliant touch. I'm sure Wirtz will change it up next year. God I hate him...
Monday, May 21, 2007
The Bron Gets His Teammates Involved
1) My favorite comments of the night from the Cavs/Pistons game:
-"I feel sorry for the rim tonight" -my buddy Chad
-"may I be granted a reprieve for anything complementary I had to say about Larry Hughes in the last round?" -Me
-"I've seen enough...I'm going to watch 'Heroes' now" -Rick
2) Ok, did anyone see the clip of that guy winning the hot wing eating contest? Has anyone seen him and Tayshaun Prince in the same room? I'm saying this is a good thing...Tayshaun seriously looks like he could stand to eat several hundred hot wings. (and as far as my actual game analysis...neither team deserved to win that game. That's my story and I'm sticking to it)
3) Can The Other Detroit Team take down Gordon Bombay and the boys tomorrow night on the road? They've outplayed them the past three games...lost two of them. Meanwhile, the world awaits the ratings bonanza that could be an Anaheim/Ottawa finals.
4) And before anyone comments on NHL ratings, keep in mind...there are 4 people in the world that will actually care about these ratings. Gary Bettman, Dick Ebersol, and whoever owns both teams in the finals. That's it. So please don't use NHL ratings to validate whatever your opinion is on the sport. You're better than that. That's my story and I'm sticking to it...
4)
-"I feel sorry for the rim tonight" -my buddy Chad
-"may I be granted a reprieve for anything complementary I had to say about Larry Hughes in the last round?" -Me
-"I've seen enough...I'm going to watch 'Heroes' now" -Rick
2) Ok, did anyone see the clip of that guy winning the hot wing eating contest? Has anyone seen him and Tayshaun Prince in the same room? I'm saying this is a good thing...Tayshaun seriously looks like he could stand to eat several hundred hot wings. (and as far as my actual game analysis...neither team deserved to win that game. That's my story and I'm sticking to it)
3) Can The Other Detroit Team take down Gordon Bombay and the boys tomorrow night on the road? They've outplayed them the past three games...lost two of them. Meanwhile, the world awaits the ratings bonanza that could be an Anaheim/Ottawa finals.
4) And before anyone comments on NHL ratings, keep in mind...there are 4 people in the world that will actually care about these ratings. Gary Bettman, Dick Ebersol, and whoever owns both teams in the finals. That's it. So please don't use NHL ratings to validate whatever your opinion is on the sport. You're better than that. That's my story and I'm sticking to it...
4)
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